Saturday, July 12, 2008

this is a terribly interesting article by Petite Anglaise on having different personalities in different languages.
It's not something I actually experience; I tend to be just the same in either language-which is probably why I come over as insane to most British guys (and girls, but in a lesser measure)

I've built myself on my British origins, because whatever happened, I was never from here, and never will be.
People often ask me why, at eighteen, I didn't apply for french nationality (which they couldn't have refused me, having come here at the age of five, done all my schooling in French public schools, obtained my baccalaureat, etcetera). The only I answer I have for that is that I'm not French. I just cannot imagine saying "I am French".
Although it is impossible to know that I'm not unless I say so-which is why as a preteen I kept it well under wraps and wouldn't speak english with my parents in public. I just wanted to be like everyone else. Strangely enough, this period, I believe, is what makes me now hang on to my nationality. I spent so much time being made to feel I was a foreigner, as soon as my foreign status was discovered, that I guess it made me decide that I was one and they could all go to hell.

In the meantime, I cannot separate my French self from my English self; in both I am stubborn, terribly polite when needs be, and swear a lot. Neither language has ascendency over the other-I wouldn't know if I speak French or English better.
The mix was made, and out came I.
Being a foreigner has always been a preoccupation of mine. I think that living in a foreign country, although perfectly integrated and my foreign-ness unnoticeable, you cannot help but thinking about it.
Especially when three times out of four, you're introduced by "this is Froufrou-she's English".
Never understood that.
Is being English my main characteristic? one wonders.

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